A NEW DOOR

A wise soul once told me,
“The negative attitude of others toward you is their pain, not Yours”

It can take years to understand this.
Especially when the wounds run deep.
Especially when the harm came from those who were meant to love us.

But the truth is:
We all carry hurt.
We all act out of fear, insecurity, shame, or grief—often without realizing it.

When life deals us pain and we don’t know how to process it, it doesn’t just disappear.
It buries itself in our bodies, in our beliefs, in our behaviors.
And little by little, it begins to shape how we show up in the world.
Sometimes cold.
Sometimes controlling.
Sometimes so numb we can’t even recognize ourselves.

We lash out, withdraw, overcompensate, or pretend we’re fine—because somewhere along the way, it stopped feeling safe to just be.

But here’s the quiet truth:
The people who hurt you were likely doing the same.
Reacting, surviving, protecting.
Not because you were unworthy of kindness, but because they didn’t know how to offer it—not even to themselves.

This doesn’t make their actions okay.
It doesn’t mean the pain didn’t matter.
But it can help you see it differently.

It was never really about you.

And if it wasn’t about you,
You don’t need to carry it anymore.

You don’t need to hold on to the shame, or the self-blame, or the story that you were too much, or not enough.

You get to breathe.
You get to soften.
You get to forgive—not to excuse, but to free.

Because when you stop taking it personally,
A weight lifts.
And in that space, something tender begins to grow.
Compassion.
Clarity.
Peace.

So if your heart is heavy with someone else’s pain,
Let this be your reminder:

You did not deserve it.
You are not defined by it.
And you don’t have to carry it any longer.

Take a moment.
Place your hand on your heart.
And whisper gently to yourself:

“I release what was never mine.
I am ready to begin again.”